How to Prepare for Summer Holidays in Greece. 7-Step Guide

Step 1: Become a Sun Worshipper

First things first, let’s talk sun preparation. If you’re planning a summer holiday in Greece, start by conditioning your body to handle the sun, much like a marathon runner conditions their legs. We suggest small doses of sunbathing in your living room with all the lights turned on. To really simulate the experience, consider watching Greek travel videos on full brightness. By the time you get to Greece, you’ll be so in tune with the sun that you might even develop a form of solar-powered photosynthesis.

Step 2: Master the Language… Sort Of

Learning Greek is easy; just remember that every word looks like a math equation and sounds like a dish you tried at that fancy restaurant last week. To blend in with locals, learn important phrases such as “Πού είναι η παραλία?” (Where is the beach?), which is crucial, and “Έχετε σαλτσιφλέκι;” (Do you have beach towels?), which is less crucial but might get a few laughs or concerned looks.

Step 3: Develop an Unbreakable Relationship with Feta Cheese

In Greece, feta cheese is the cornerstone of culinary delights. Start integrating feta into every meal of the day to ensure your body can handle the cheesy onslaught in Greece. Breakfast? Feta omelette. Lunch? Feta salad. Dinner? Feta with a side of feta. This will prepare your taste buds for the feta-fantastic journey they are about to embark on.

Step 4: Pack Everything… and Then Some

When packing for Greece, it’s important to remember that you need more than just swimsuits and sunscreen. Pack items that will cover every possible scenario: snorkels for spontaneous scuba diving, fancy clothes for meeting a shipping magnate who invites you to a yacht party, and hiking boots for when you inevitably decide to explore a random mountain trail. And of course, an extra suitcase for all the feta cheese you’ll be bringing back.

Step 5: Practice Your Mythology Excuses

You will likely be asked about your favorite Greek myth or god. It’s crucial to have an obscure answer ready. Forget Zeus and Hades; dive deep and profess your admiration for Priapus, the minor god of garden fertility. Not only will it make you seem incredibly cultured, but you’ll provide endless entertainment to any history buffs in earshot.

Step 6: Embrace Greek Time

In Greece, schedules are more of a suggestion than an actual plan. Prepare to embrace ‘Greek time’, which means that if you arrange to meet someone at 3 PM, you might consider showing up around 5 PM, or maybe not at all. Start practicing by setting your watches and clocks to a random time, living in a delightful time warp that ensures you’re always fashionably late or confusingly early.

Step 7: Become a Sea Salt Connoisseur

Finally, prepare yourself for the sea. Greeks have a deep connection with the ocean, and you’ll find that swimming in the Greek seas is like dipping into a liquid jewel. To get ready, start taking salt water baths. If anyone questions your new hobby, explain that you’re seasoning yourself to blend in with the Mediterranean vibes.